Last Saturday I went to a church conference for women. At one point a song was sung in which a woman feels she is doing something for everyone she loves and yet wonders what it is all worth and when she gets her time. The chorus went something along the lines of; In the meantime she is being molded and refined.
That really got me thinking. I once had it all figured out and was doing pretty good. Then another baby came along while my youngest was still a baby and ever since then I feel like I am losing it. Between the feedings, diaper changes, dressing and comforting it is impossible to do much else, oh, and then there is the house to take care of and the other three children to teach and nurture.
I picture myself one day as a mid-wife, helping other women bring their babies into this world. It is something I am passionate about and think I would not only be good at but would really enjoy. One day. when my children are old enough to build on the foundation their father and I have laid. When no one is dependent on me. When it is just me and the dream I want to pursue.
There is comfort in knowing that my time will come. I am sure of it. Please do not dissuade me, for there are days when this feels like my only comfort.
And as I change another diaper, feed another child, do another load of laundry, recieve another smile, kiss and hug, hear "your the best" from my child one more time; I will remember that not only will it be my turn someday, but in the meantime I am being molded and refined.